It's a scenario that many women are familiar with – you're dating a great guy, things are going well, and then out of nowhere, he starts to pull away. You may start to question yourself and wonder what you did to cause this change in behavior. In this video, we will uncover the 12 mistakes that women often make when a man pulls away, and how to prevent them from happening in your own relationships.

1. Panicking

When a man pulls away, it can be easy to panic and think the relationship is over. This can lead to feeling desperate and trying to get him to change his mind. It can also make you take on an overly aggressive or passive-aggressive approach in an attempt to get his attention. This can push him further away and damage the relationship.

Psychologically, panicking can be a form of self-sabotage. When you panic, you are focusing on the negative outcome instead of the positive possibilities. This can lead to a feeling of hopelessness and a fear of being alone, which can prevent you from finding a solution and moving forward.

3 Other Examples Of What This Could Look Like Are:

1. Constantly sending him texts or messages.
2. Reacting angrily and making demands.
3. Becoming overly clingy or needy.

2. Over-Analyzing

When a man pulls away, it can be a difficult and confusing experience for a woman. Instead of trying to understand what is happening, a woman may over-analyze the situation, drawing conclusions without all the facts. Over-analyzing can lead to further frustration and confusion, and can damage the relationship.

Psychologically, over-analyzing can be a sign of insecurity and lack of trust in the relationship. This can cause a woman to become anxious and doubt herself, leading to a breakdown of communication and a lack of understanding between the two.

3 Other Examples Of What This Could Look Like Are:

1. Constantly questioning what the man is thinking or feeling.
2. Excessively trying to figure out what is wrong without being open to hearing the man's perspective.
3. Trying to predict the future of the relationship based on assumptions.

3. Blaming Yourself

When a man pulls away, it’s easy to focus on what you did wrong instead of looking at the bigger picture. You might think that if you just did something differently, he wouldn’t have left.

Psychologically, you can easily become overwhelmed by a sense of failure or inadequacy. It’s important to remember that it takes two to make or break a relationship. It’s not all on you.

3 Other Examples Of What This Could Look Like Are:

1. Thinking you’re not attractive enough.
2. Feeling like you didn’t do enough to make the relationship work.
3. Worrying that you said or did something wrong.

4. Becoming Desperate

When a man pulls away, it can be tempting to become desperate in an effort to try to get him to stay. You may start to pursue him, or make yourself available to him at any time, or even resort to begging or pleading. While it’s natural to feel the urge to reconnect, this can often push him further away.

Psychologically, desperation can be a major turn-off for men and it can make you appear insecure. It can also make you seem overly needy and clingy, and it communicates a lack of self-respect and value.

3 Other Examples Of What This Could Look Like Are:

1. Constantly sending him messages or calling him to check in.
2. Making yourself too available and always available when he wants to see you.
3. Begging and pleading for him to stay or to give your relationship another chance.

5. Giving Ultimatums

When a man pulls away, it can be tempting to give him an ultimatum to try to get him to stay. But this can backfire and push the man even further away. Ultimatums can create a confrontational situation and put the man in a difficult position. It can make him feel like he has to choose between you and his freedom.

Ultimatums can also demonstrate a lack of trust in the relationship and the man’s intentions. This can be damaging to the relationship and make it difficult for him to come back.

3 Other Examples Of What This Could Look Like Are:

1. Telling him he needs to stay and commit to the relationship or leave.
2. Asking him to choose between you and a certain activity or friend.
3. Making demands about how he should interact with you or act in the relationship.

6. Becoming Passive-Aggressive

When a man pulls away, it’s important to take a step back and avoid reacting out of anger or fear. Becoming passive-aggressive is a way of expressing your feelings indirectly, which can ultimately lead to further separation and resentment. It’s important to take a deep breath and not let your emotions get the better of you.

Psychologically, passive-aggressive behavior is often associated with a fear of confrontation and an inability to express emotions directly. When a man pulls away emotionally, passive-aggressive behavior may be a way to indirectly express your own feelings without having to actually confront him.

3 Other Examples Of What This Could Look Like Are:

1. Making sarcastic comments
2. Withholding attention or affection
3. Making snide remarks or criticizing him harshly

7. Not Giving Him Space

When a man pulls away, it's important to give him the space he needs. Trying to force him to stay or forcing him to talk to you can make him feel overwhelmed and cause him to further pull away. Instead, step back and give him the time and space he needs to feel comfortable and reconnect with you.

Psychologically, when a man pulls away, it's often because he needs time to evaluate and process his feelings and thoughts. If he doesn't have the space to do this, it can cause him to feel overwhelmed.

3 Other Examples Of What This Could Look Like Are:

1. Constantly sending him messages and asking him why he's pulling away.
2. Refusing to hang out with your friends unless he's there.
3. Making him feel like he has to answer all of your questions right away.

8. Jumping to Conclusions

When a man pulls away, it can be easy to jump to conclusions and make assumptions about why he is doing so. This can lead to forming false narratives about the relationship and putting pressure on the man to act in a certain way.

Psychologically, jumping to conclusions can be an example of confirmation bias – a tendency to search for information that confirms our beliefs, rather than question them. This can have a negative effect on the relationship, as it can lead to arguments and miscommunication.

3 Other Examples Of What This Could Look Like Are:

1. Assuming that your partner is pulling away because they don’t love you.
2. Thinking that if he doesn’t do what you want, it means he doesn’t care.
3. Believing that if he doesn’t talk to you, he must be cheating.

9. Ignoring Your Own Needs

When a man pulls away, it’s natural to want to focus on him and try to understand why he’s distancing himself. But, it’s important to remember to take care of yourself too.

Psychologically, it’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that you’re not complete without him or that you need him to be happy. But, in reality, you are enough and you don’t need anyone else to define your worth.

3 Other Examples Of What This Could Look Like Are:

1. Make sure you're taking time to do things you enjoy, like going for a walk, visiting friends or taking a class.
2. Spend time with people who make you feel good about yourself and who lift you up.
3. Prioritize your mental and physical health by getting enough sleep, eating well, and engaging in activities that help you reduce stress.

10. Not Seeking Coaching

When a man pulls away, it can be difficult to understand why it is happening and it's easy to start feeling overwhelmed or confused. It helps to talk to someone who can provide an unbiased, outside perspective. Coaching can help you gain a better understanding of the situation and how you can respond in a productive and positive way.

Psychologically, seeking coaching can help provide clarity and guidance, which can help you move forward in a healthy way. It can also help you identify any patterns or beliefs that may be contributing to the current situation.

3 Other Examples Of What This Could Look Like Are:

1. Working with a professional love coach (like my wife and I for example)
2. Participating in a group discussion or workshop.
3. Taking an online dating or relationship training program.

11. Rushing To Replace Him

When a man pulls away, it can be tempting to rush into a new relationship as a way to deal with the hurt from the last one. But this is a mistake. It can be difficult to fully recover from a past relationship when you’ve jumped into a new one. Plus, it can be hard to be open to true love if you’re still carrying baggage from the past.

Psychologically, when a person is hurt, they often want to fill that hole with something else. This can lead to rushing into a new relationship too soon.

3 Other Examples Of What This Could Look Like Are:

1. Immediately joining a dating app or starting to date someone new after a breakup.
2. Going on multiple first dates in a short amount of time.
3. Trying to quickly become serious with someone new.

12. Avoiding Self-Reflection

When a man pulls away, it’s important for you to take some time to reflect on yourself and the relationship before reacting. It’s easy to get overwhelmed and begin blaming yourself or the situation, but it’s important to objectively assess the situation.

Reflection allows you to understand why the man may have pulled away in the first place. It may be due to a lack of emotional connection, unmet needs or a lack of communication. Reflection also gives you the chance to take a step back and look at the bigger picture.

3 Other Examples Of What This Could Look Like Are:

1. Taking a break from the relationship to assess what needs to be changed
2. Taking the time to explore your own emotions and needs
3. Looking at the relationship from an outside perspective and considering what went wrong.

Remember, when a man pulls away, it's important to remain calm and avoid these common mistakes. By maintaining your self worth, communicating effectively, and understanding his needs, you can create a strong, healthy and lasting relationship.

Next, if you’d like to discover a powerful psychological trigger to make any man DESIRE you, then take our FREE Love Quiz at or subscribe and click on the link in the description below to get that now, and I'll see you there. 🙂

Antia & Brody Boyd
Antia & Brody Boyd

Husband and wife team Antia & Brody Boyd have been helping thousands of successful women all over the world for over 20 years combine to get a loving, long-term & committed relationship with a high-quality man fast without loneliness, frustration or rejection. They've also been featured expert speakers at Google, the Harvard University Faculty Club, ABC Radio & Good Morning San Diego.

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