5 SIGNS THAT SOMEONE IS NOT YOUR SOULMATE (THEY MAY BREAK YOUR HEART) ? Knowing the signs someone is your soulmate and the big soulmate signs to look for can be key to actually attracting a soulmate! Discovering the signs someone is your soulmate or NOT is often the secret to actually know how to attract a soulmate. If you’re very clear on the signs he’s NOT the one then you can often save a lot of wasted time. Developing a soulmate intuition to see the signs a soulmate is near or even twin flame signs can help you also know the signs to LEAVE. Learn how to tell if it’s a soulmate or not with these key tips! ?
Would you like to know the five signs that someone is definitely not your soulmate and may break your heart?
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Now, it's not always easy to find out if you are with your soulmate or not. We all tend to have rose-colored glasses. So here are five signs that make it clear that he is not your soulmate.
5. They Don’t Respect You
Sign number five, is they don't respect you. I hear this all the time. You may feel like you may have to learn another lesson, or you have some kind of karma, but he is simply not respecting you. This could either show up as him not showing up on time, not calling you when he says he will, or he simply is not treating you like a queen. Either way, he's not really considering your needs. In short, he doesn't care. Soulmates will care very much, you are connected with them on all levels. That also includes that he tremendously looks up to you and he respects you, just as you look up to him and respect him. So if he doesn't respect you, he is not your soulmate.
4. It Rarely Feels Easy
Sign number four that he is not your soulmate, is it rarely feels easy. Now, if you have grown up in a household where your parents were arguing all the time, or you were simply not ever getting the attention from your parents that you deserved then you learned that in the world of love, it is hard. It is a struggle to attract attention, to attract love, and to even deserve love. If that shows up in your relationship, this is not a sign that this is your soulmate even though your blueprint wants you to believe that they are because it feels familiar. But soulmates don't necessarily feel familiar at all, it can oftentimes be the complete opposite, that they feel like a fish out of water, and you feel you are in a free fall. So if it's not easy, he's not the one.
Soulmates have an easy-flowing relationship, they often also have a friendship that serves as a foundation of this particular relationship. It is almost so easy that you wonder, “Can I trust that?” Because remember, if your emotional guidance system taught you that love is hard when you attract your soulmate and it is so easy, like easy as breathing, you may wonder, “Hmm, is this the right one?” Chances are that is indeed actually your soulmate. What you may be experiencing however is you may be in a recalibration phase, where you're moving from being attracted to emotionally unavailable, or maybe even abusive men, to being attracted to your soulmate. That in-between space can feel like a free fall, that can feel empty, it can even feel boring because your nervous system is highly activated and aggravated with that man that is unavailable. So if it's not easy, it's not your soulmate.
3. They Are Non-Committal
Sign number three, they are non-committal. You have this inner little girl part inside of yourself, and that little inner girl has hope and anticipation, and she feels like she can turn men around because once upon a time, she was hoping that she could turn her dad or her mom around. She thought if she jumps just through enough hoops, she will finally get the attention she needed. So you're attracted to non-committal men and you think, “No, he is my soulmate, he wants to commit to me.” This man may even say that he simply can't love. I dated a guy once who outright told me he couldn’t love, that he doesn't know what love is, and he doesn't know how to access his heart. So if he's non-committal, he's not your soulmate.
Soulmates commit easily to each other. Often they know from the very beginning that they are meant for each other. But here’s the thing, one person usually knows right away, and ideally, this is the man. Some of you may feel “Mmh okay, I have to maybe wait and just get used to this.” So many of you may not know until two or three months later, but either way, there will be consistency, there will be a consistent follow-through, and there will be no fear of commitment. Your soulmate cannot wait to commit to you. So if you are dating a non-committal man who just can't keep his promises, or he just can't commit, he just won't give you that exclusivity, he needs to continue dating other women, he just needs to go on another date. I don't care how much fun you have with him, I don't care how much he makes you feel like you are a princess when you're with him. If he doesn't follow through on that in all areas of his life, he is not the one.
2. They Try To Control You
Sign number two that he's not your soulmate is they try to control you. Now if you feel the man that you are dating is trying to turn you into something that you are not, he's trying to turn you into something that is more what he likes, and he's trying to manipulate you. Maybe he’s trying to take control over your life, over your experience, over your friends, trying to invade your space and you can feel it – you will start to feel like something is wrong and start to feel a bit suffocated – like you're losing yourself and you start to feel a separation from yourself. That means he's not your soulmate.
Soulmates support each other and fully accept each other for exactly who they are. Now, are they going to have some weak moments? Oh, for sure you better believe they do. But they have healthy communication tools that will help them to navigate even the most difficult conversations and situations. If you're being controlled all the time, and the other person doesn't care who you are, and doesn't cherish you in your uniqueness and is trying to be more narcissistic around you, and you are the victim of that, chances are he is not your soulmate.
Soulmates are not narcissistic with each other. Soulmates are loving and compassionate to each other. And remember they have this beautiful friendship underneath, they build so much trust with each other and have so much transparency with each other, that when a situation occurs where let's say you could guilt trip, or you could sabotage, or you could control your man, you're not going to do it. You would rather talk about it because the intimacy that you have created over that time will be so much more worth it to you. Honestly, it feels so much more real. So if he controls you, he's not your soulmate.
1. They Put Very Little Effort Into The Relationship
And finally, sign number one is he's putting very little effort into the relationship. So if he doesn't care, he doesn't call you, he doesn't remember your favorite color. Maybe he doesn't ask you any questions, he's not all that interested in you. You go out together, and he has a wandering eye, or his friends are much more important to him, he makes other things much more of a priority. Work is more important, his family is more important, friends are more important, travel's more important. At some point, you have to come to realize that this means he's not your soulmate.
Your soulmate will want you to be part of his life. Sure, he will have his own aspects of his life that he loves to create and live by himself, which my husband and I have as well, but he will always make the effort, he's very interested in you. He wants to know about your world, he wants to know who you are, he wants to know your love language so he knows how to cherish you. Ultimately, he wants to make you happy. If you are with a man who doesn't want to make you happy, who doesn't even know what makes you happy, and who's only focused on himself, chances are he's not your soulmate.
So now it's your turn! Which of those five signs do you resonate with the most and when have you thought that you are with your soulmate when indeed, you were just with another avoidant unavailable man? As usual, I would love to hear your answers to our question of the day in the comments section below. If you feel like “Wow, I always attract those men into my life, and I always think they're my soulmates.” Don’t worry, I used to be the same, you should read my journals. If that's you, I invite you to take my Magnetize Your Man quiz by clicking the button below.