Discover how to hook a man and 5 ways to get him BACK! To get him running back to you can sometimes be tough, however when you know how to hook a guy and how to get your man back AFTER you messed up it can help you to get him back forever. Knowing these secrets for how to get him hooked can also help you to make him interested again and get his interest BACK even if you lost it before. Enjoy! 😊
1. Release Him
Hear me out, I know what you want to say. Are you kidding me Antia? I don’t want to release him, I don’t want him to be out of my life. No, this is not what I mean. So what happens is we get attached to an outcome. So, you are getting attached to a man, you are getting attached actually to a response that we desire from a man, it’s not the man itself. It’s the response to a behavioral pattern that we want from a man. So, what I’m saying here is to actually release him, release your attachment to him and that response you desire from him.
Do a meditation, where you can simply visualize putting him in something like a life-sized balloon, if you will, and watching him float away. Feel the impact that has on your body because what happens is when you do energetic exercises like this, they have an emotional impact on you, and they surely create more space inside of you. That space is what is highly magnetic to that man. How many times have we had this experience where women have done those kinds of exercises and lo and behold, within an hour or two, guys were calling them and checking in. So many people don’t know why that is. How does the man know that I’m no longer thinking about him? How does the man know that I’m no longer attached to him? I believe that in a few years we will have much more clarity on that on a day-to-day basis. So until then, I highly recommend releasing him.
2. Don’t Invest Too Soon
I see this all the time, women making themselves available until the cows come home. And what I’m seeing is that there’s exclusivity too fast and I wonder, do you even know the six archetypes of this man? Have you seen all parts of him? Or have you just seen a few parts of him? Maybe just on a good day, so you don’t even know if that’s consistent. So, it’s really important to stop investing too soon.
So instead, tell yourself after a date or when you’re not hearing from him, “I don’t know this guy. I know how he projected himself, and how I perceived him.” In that particular moment, we don’t even know if that’s stable over time. That’s one fix that you want to look at and then you want to be pleasantly surprised when he comes back into your life – when he asks you out on another date.
It must have been at least 10 years ago, I read a story in Cosmopolitan of all places, and the article was all about interviewing all the team members that had worked for Cosmopolitan who had gotten married. They were interviewing this one couple and they said, “well, every day was like our first date.” So, in treating every day as their first date they didn’t assume that there’s going to be a second date- there wasn’t an immediate attachment.
It also means they were not trying to fill in the blanks which of course, the anxious attachment style often does. What you want to do instead is imagine pulling back that Mustang. You feel this Mustang, this horse that just wants to race to the front and instead you say, “Whoa!, not so fast.” What you want to do is just take a breath, see what you enjoyed about him so far, even if you never saw that man again. It’s going to let you be more grounded, and it’s going to get you more embodied which ends up being more magnetic.
3. Take Him Off The Pedestal
Girlfriend, one thing I always say is that soulmates are real. The pedestal you put him on is certainly not. No one and I repeat, no one, deserves to feel superior towards you, because guess what? If he’s superior towards you, you are naturally inferior. Why are you inferior? What does he have that you don’t? It’s a partnership.
So, what you do, is you take him off the pedestal and allow him to have flaws. When we put a man on a pedestal, we’re going to do two things, either we don’t allow him to have flaws, which is often the case for the dismissive-avoidant attachment style. Or we’re deleting his flaws, which often is the case for of course the anxious-ambivalent attachment style. You want to be aware of that because you will not be able to see all of who he is. You’re only going to see the good things and guess what? He’s going to feel that.
I’ve talked with lots of men and they told me that they can tell when a woman is putting him on a pedestal and he feels like he can only fall off. Often they feel like they can’t trust this woman because they can’t be themselves around her, she has already decided who he is and isn’t. There’s no more freedom of self-expression, no more surprises, no more spontaneity, there’s only the assumption she has about him and that’s not freedom. When a man feels that he’s going to pull back.
There’s also something very inauthentic in saying that you’re inferior and he’s superior. He loses all respect for you. Why are you inferior? He’s going to start finding reasons for that. Which of course are also just projected because the brain deletes, distorts and generalizes reality based on his or her unconscious expectations. So a word to the wise, take him off the pedestal.
4. Be The First To End The Date Or Call
One thing that I always tell my women, you want to treat a date like the meal you have when you go to a restaurant. Do you have an appetizer? Like an ahi tuna, that’s one of my favorite appetizers, that appetizer leaves you wanting more, you can’t wait for the entree. So, you always want to be a little bit like that, leave him wondering, “oh, how’s the story going to continue?”
Now in dating reality TV shows, and I’m thinking about The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. What do we do when the commercial comes on? We sit through the commercial. Why? Because the show probably left you on a cliffhanger and we don’t know what’s going to happen. We need to know so we wait out the commercials so we don’t miss it. Use that to your advantage and leave him wanting more. Be the first to end the call, that shows confidence, too. Be the first to say, “it’s been a lovely night. Thank you so much for dinner.” That creates tension. Something mesmerizing has been created and when you do that, you have no idea the impact it has on a man and how magnetic it is. So give it a try.
5. Be Me Focus Vs Him Focused
Something that’s attractive to a man is if you are loving yourself, respecting yourself, and focusing on yourself and how you feel in your body. Doing this means you also feel when you’re not in your body, and you know when to stop and take a breath so you can really be in the moment and feel what they said, or what you’re doing in your body. You’re handing him an emotional resume.
This means he gets to feel his own emotions as well. He can create more trust and rapport between the two of you and of course, attraction because again there’s this nice tension, it’s the healthy tension that we’re looking for. If he feels like he can be himself, then he feels more comfortable creating an interdependent connection between the two of you versus when you’re just him focused.
When you’re just focused on him, then he’s asking himself, ”Who are you?” You are so caught up in his world and who he is, and you’re curious about him but he doesn’t feel you. He doesn’t know what you are all about. He doesn’t know what it feels like for you to come back to yourself versus going towards him and guess what? When you come back to yourself he’ll always come back to you as well because men treat you the way you treat yourself.
Ladies, this is it for today. If you enjoyed this article, I invite you to take my free playlist course down below. What are you going to learn? How to make a man chase you. Also if you haven’t done so already, go ahead and take my free Magnetize Your Man quiz at magnetizeyourman.com where you got more personalized dating strategies your way.