Wondering if you are currently with a trustworthy man? In this guide, we will break down 6 signs that the man you are with is someone you can trust.
1. He Respects Your Boundaries and His Own Boundaries
This is extremely important because when you go on a date, you want a trustworthy man who respects you if you say no, you're not ready to go to the next stage yet, or no you're not ready to go home with him, or whatever boundary it is that you set with him. However, at the same time, you also want to know that he respects his own boundaries. In other words, he is not a people pleaser. You can not in a million years trust a people pleaser because what he thinks, says, and does is not in alignment, he will sell out on his own truth because he wants to be liked by you so badly. So, it really goes both ways.
Be careful when you meet men who are always there for you or are always bending over backwards to do things for you because you may be falling for a people pleaser. The people-pleaser secretly has some resentment inside of himself. first and foremost, towards himself but then he also starts to project that resentment onto you. So I think my husband is a really great example; of course, he respected my boundaries when I set them and although I did trust him pretty fast, he didn't try to push them, which I really appreciate. But what I appreciated, even more, is that he had his own boundaries, and he would not move from them even when I was annoyed. That, of course, made me extremely attracted to him.
So tell me below in the comments section if this has happened to you where a man has actually set boundaries, and you thought that was really sexy.
2. He Initiates
I know opinions on this can be divided, that men also want a woman to initiate, but let me tell you something, when a man initiates he actually shows that he trusts himself. If he needs a woman to initiate then he does not trust himself. He needs to have all those signals, and that will continue to show up in your relationship. So think about it, if a man doesn't trust himself then he's not going to pick the restaurant because he doesn't trust that you're going to love it, or he doesn't trust that he's going to pick the right vacation place, or he doesn't trust that he understands when it's time to move. So every time you have to be the one that actually trusts enough for the both of you because he doesn't trust himself enough to face that potential of death or failure.
This is actually what a man has to go through, the man's spirit, the animal's spirit, that primitive part inside of him, in order for him to create a stronger backbone and more belief inside of himself. This means that he not only continues to pursue you but also he's continued to trust himself in his decisions. After being together with my husband for eight years, let me tell you one thing, you want to have a man who trusts himself. It gets really old if you're dealing with a man who doesn't trust himself, and you constantly have to mother him and smother him. Like you'll always be masculine, and he was never in a million years able to hold space for you.
This and more we chat about in my free dating support group. So if you haven't joined that already hop on over to mymfbgroup.com. The link is below this article as well, I’m excited to see you there.
3. His Words Match His Actions
Now, if you've been on my blog for a while we sometimes talk about attachment styles. The attachment that you can trust the least is the dismissive-avoidant attachment style also known as an emotionally unavailable man. That, in and of itself, is an insecurity that shows up as inconsistency; meaning you can't trust his words, they don't match his actions. As a matter of fact, he's going to go into fantasyland, and he's going to say how beautiful it would be to go to the Copacabana with you, and that his mom would really love you, etc. You’ve seen this before when a man comes on strong but there’s just no follow-through, there’s no way to actually sustain that.
So, let me know below in the comment section if that has happened to you. If you attracted men into your life who made you all those empty promises but was not even able to call you consistently, he wasn't even able to pursue you consistently, to ask you out on dates, to treat you a queen, comment below and let me know.
4. He Talks Highly About Other People, Especially When They’re Not Present
You see, you can really see and judge the character of a man in how he talks about other people when they're not present. That really shows you how much honor he has inside of himself. Is he gossiping? Because then you know, wait a minute, when he then hangs out with his friends is he going to gossip about me? That in no way can make you feel safe in your relationship because you don't know what you can share with him, and what you better keep to yourself. So it's really important to make sure you make a distinction here.
On the other hand, of course, you know that when a man talks highly about other people in your presence, you also can rest assured that he will talk highly about you with other people as well. After all, you want to have an advocate in your relationship, in your partnership – a man you can truly trust through thick and thin. Life can get complicated in Its ups, its downs, there are so many unexpected twists and turns, and what you really need is a steadfast foundation of trust and authenticity in your relationship in order to continue to grow with him.
Now, if you want to attract this man into your life but you just don't know how to do that, I invite you to take my free Magnetize Your Man quiz at mymquiz.com or click that button down below this article. You will get specialized dating strategies from me, personalized just for you.
5. He Has Integrity
Now when the man has integrity you can't push him around. Great story here is when I met my husband Brody in Hawaii, I thought, well, we are in Hawaii so let's go sailing, let's go paddleboarding, let's go kayaking, let's dive with the turtles and so on. So I tried to kinda seduce them away from his work. But when I met my husband Brody he was so diligent, and he literally worked from nine to five at a coffee shop every day.
That's right, while you watched everyone else with surfboards walking to the beach right in front of his nose he made shit happen, so to say. Well, I thought I could seduce him away from this. Let's do something different. So I remember one lunch break I came over, I was living on the other side of the island back then, and I came over and I said, hey, let's have some fun, let's go to the beach, but he was like no, I work from nine to five. I was so annoyed because I had the outcome that I was attached to and I kinda wanted to have it my way or the highway, and I didn't get that. Even though I was really annoyed, and really aggravated, like why is this guy so complicated, let's just go to the beach. I developed so much trust and respect for my husband because I knew I couldn't just push him around. I knew that he's so connected to his purpose that he would be willing to “lose me” for the short term.
So it showed me that he's getting that from somewhere else, from another source, so I'm not the source of his happiness which of course made me feel extremely safe, and grow in attraction 10 fold. Now, if that has happened to you that a man has actually put his purpose above your relationship but you actually ended up trusting him, or if you have never experienced that comment below, let me know your story.
6. He Doesn’t Put You Down In a Fight
Often you can really judge the character of a man when you are bickering with him. When you're in a tense situation that's full of charge such as an argument, where there's conflict, you can actually see how much capacity he has for pressure, for tension, and for an increase of his own capacity. Now what often happens when you're in an argument is the other person actually fights against you, and starts to see you as the enemy. They will use everything that they have learned about you against you, or so at least our fear goes.
However, you can really judge if he's a trustworthy man if he doesn't do that. If he even says let's just not go there, let's just not hurt each other's feelings, let me just scream into my pillow instead, let me just drive around the block and let's reconvene, because he's actually protecting your heart. In short he respects you way too much to attack you and to insult you, and to put you down, and diminish you to the point of no return. You see when we're in an argument, when we're in a fight we can get to the point where it's really hard to recover from. So if he knows himself to be this way but he's also extremely protective of you which is a sign that you can absolutely trust him he will fight fair. So he will stay above the belt. He will stay in a logical argument, or he will go on a run, or whatever it takes remove himself from the situation short term so that he doesn't hurt your feelings.
So I would love to hear from you which of those points resonated with you the most, and which ones have you actually experienced in a man. Because even though you have not attracted a trustworthy man into your life yet, just see where you have experienced potential signals of that trust in your life through meeting different kinds of men. What you focus on expands, so again comment below let me know, and we will draw from those comments a winner for a copy for Magnetizing Your Man audiobook.
For those of you who stay to the very end here is your bonus secret! He loves you at your worst. Sometimes women ask me, how do I know when I meet my soulmate? My answer to that is he loves you when you are in your shadow. Every other man will run, will blame you, will shame you, but not the men that you can trust. Don't believe me? Let me share this story with you.
When I met my husband Brody, I had a complete meltdown, and it was literally a day before he proposed to me by the way, so I think it's a really good example because I was so stressed out. I was dealing with finals in college and a lot of other things. So I was yelling at him, I was the biggest bitch, but yet he loves my shadow. So much so that he proposed marriage to me the next day. So that would be an example for you that your man will love you at your worst.
If you find men who judge you all the time, they say, “if you only were this,” and “if you only would be more polite,” and “if you only would be more feminine.” That is not your man, you can't mess it up. Sure, I'm definitely not saying go in, and abuse this man, and basically verbally beat the crap out of him, or become the biggest bitch on the planet every single day, obviously, I didn't do that on purpose. But what I'm saying is if that happens, and you have a temper, or you have a reactive moment don't think that you just lost him, because a man that you can really trust, you can be all colors of the rainbow with.
Trustworthy Man Conclusion
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